My First Text Message Relationship, Part I

Behold, 15-year-old Lauren:

To protect certain individuals (who will more than likely never read this blog), I’ve edited out the names with my amazing Photoshop skills. Sorry for any disappointment this causes.

Wow, yes. So much to make fun of, so little time.

This, as you can tell, was the year of my first Samsung flip phone—big things were happening in my life. And I had a huge crush on a guy that I had absolutely no chance with (only because he was eight years older than me). We’ll call him Drake.

Spoiler alert: Drake got married and had two kids within the next couple of years. My poor little heart…

Drake, whom I mentioned in the above entry, isn’t really the point. I actually stopped liking him around July 18, according to that entry.

The fact that around that time I started to get texts from a different guy didn’t hurt, either. Thus began my first pseudo-relationship with a guy we’ll call Jimmy. And by pseudo I mean we didn’t actually date, he just told me he liked me so we texted back and forth and sometimes even instant-messaged late at night on MySpace. Obviously things got pretty serious.

Jimmy was the first guy to “sweet talk” me, for lack of a better term. I’ll let my adolescent self explain as she did on August 13, 2005:

As you can see, I was getting texts that said things like, “Hey, beautiful,” and “Miss you, kiddo.” (Side note: Don’t ever call someone other than an actual kid “kiddo.”) And I was young and excitable and got lured into this trap. BUT, like all relationships based solely upon the foundations of flirty text messages, things turned sour.

Less than a month later:

Less than a month later, he got a girlfriend, and his way of telling me was to stop talking to me. Super classy guy.

Oh, how I wish I could tell you that this was the end of the Jimmy Saga. Alas, it was not.

Thankfully I chronicled it all in the Eiffel Tower journal, so one day when I had a blog of my own I could share it all with you.

Oh, the joys of reminiscence. More to come very, very soon.

– Lo